Midsommrarna Förbi

First there is kissing rain, the kind that you feel in small pricks on the back of your neck as you walk between buildings. There’s a coolness and a shyness about it, so much so that you hardly notice it when it begins.

Next there is rain rain. Rain rain is swift to come and when it does it means it. In fat warm drops seeping the heat from the air, it means it. In thundering clouds and hairs standing on ends, it means it. Before you know it you’re overtaken and running for cover, all of the destiny you can glimpse mercilessly intwined with this wondrous chaos of weather.

A moment or an hour or a day later it’s all sun and golden trumpets and a maybe radioactive plum from the tree growing among all the other improbable flora makes a fine, though sour, treat. The air is still swampy though strangely light to breathe, fragrant even.

Summer solstice in northern latitudes is a spectacular thing. Although here is hardly North; ten thirty and the light is gone, already the timid last patches vanishing silently, liquidly behind the western Jura.

Empty, tonight, the city is oddly white and bareboned. Buildings are either lit or else seem to illuminate of their own accord, and walking home though midnight I’m left wondering where the years have gotten to. Where went the times when the filling of a year, especially this time of year when I notice it most, seemed like an achievement rather than a judgment? When the filling of time matched the linearity of time itself. Where went the times you woke up, the glow of summer fresh on the morning, school having just ended, the Best Week of the Year (besides Christmas) about to begin?

I’m left also wondering if the simplicity of it is just in the remembering. Of course it is, of course it is. Knowing speaks before recalling can correct it: It’s how we can remember things we’ve never experienced. Remember what you will, and the rest is left festering in a past so strangely distant it seems rosy.

Where, then, went all the time between the height of delirium of just one year ago, dreaming in any multitude of costumed meadows, and the maddening delirium of today: unistalling and reinstalling LabView, watching the last light flood from behind tilted blinds, smiling and made speechless by so much randomness.


One Response to “Midsommrarna Förbi”

  1. I fill the year « the daily saga Says:

    […] Installing Labview on my boss’s computer. Making a cake and failing. Absorbing the capricious central European summer. Blogging cryptically about it. […]

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